India has become a romantically liberal society, especially the urban regions. But the thought process of marriage for an average Indian is still old-school. The myth that a person can love truly only once in a lifetime stands tall even in the metros. This myth explains a lot about the insecurities of people going into marriage.
In the modern age, when people are needlessly falling in the gamble of love, undergoing the bitter-sweet experiences beforehand have inadvertently caused the pollution of an expression of love. The pre-marital peccadilloes have no adverse consequences if they are both sided, and well sidelined. However, if the ex continues to play a part in their life, or if there is only a single sinner, it often creates marital turbulence. The partner feels cheated at the expense of chastity, purity and lack of exclusivity of their sacred relationship.
Gone is the time when the virility of the husband, his pre-marital amorous escapades went unnoticed while the wife was subjected to a test of purity. Now, if either of the partner jumps the gun, their seems to be an unannounced competition with the ex, a performance pressure, violating the nascent bond of intimacy.
People need to be adults about these issues. They need to treat marriage as an exalted relationship between 2 consenting adults of committed monogamy by building a loving, intimate, trusting and respectful relationship. However it would be prudent only if the ex remains an ex!
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